Woman lost bike 42 years

Woman lost bike 42 years_A Wellfleet, Mass., woman has been reunited with a bike she lost as a young girl  The woman, who was 11 at the time, said she lost control while riding the bike over a bridge and fell into a muddy stream  After that, she thought her bike sunk deep into the mud – until now

The little girl thought she had lost her new bike forever when she tumbled off a rickety bridge over a muddy stream in Wellfleet, Mass., 42 years ago.

But the bike has been found — by the now-grown woman’s own wife.

Lisa Brown tells the Cape Cod Times  she was 11 when she lost control while riding over the Herring River in 1970 and fell in. She came up “smelling like a snapping turtle” but could not locate her bike in the muddy depths.

Brown’s wife, Deirdre Olinger, was walking along the stream this spring when she spotted a rusted bike tangled in the undergrowth about a quarter mile from the bridge.

Brown, tipped off by the banana seat, knew immediately it was hers. She describes the discovery like “finding a long lost friend.”

Big news out of Cape Cod today last June, where a woman who lost her first childhood bike in a river 42 years ago has been reacquainted with it.

More importantly, as Britain's Daily Mail, your number one source for last June's Cape Cod news, points out: THIS WOMAN IS A LESBIAN.

Here's their headline:

"Lesbian reunited with bike she lost FOUR DECADES ago after her own wife spots it in a muddy stream"

What will the lesbians do next?

Most of the Mail article appears to be a direct transcription of The Lesbian's interview video posted on The Cape Cod Times' website. (Those suckers don't even mention the lesbian angle in their video caption. You're burying the lede, Cape Cod Times.)

The video itself is very charming (The Lesbian, her wife—also a lesbian—and the small town reporter with big time energy assigned to cover the bicycle beat all get really into dramatically recreating every event) but here's a rough summary if you don't have time to watch it now.

One day, in 1970, 11-year-old lesbian Lisa Brown was riding her bike across a rickety wooden bridge over what is reverently described as "the mighty Herring river." As she went to make a slight adjustment to her path, Brown The Lesbian lost her balance and tumbled into the water, along with her bike. While Brown would eventually escape her watery grave and go on to become a great lesbian, her bike, deeply immersed in the muck, was considered lost to the ages.

Forty-two years later, Brown's wife Dierdre was walking the couple's dog about a quarter mile from the splash site when she noticed the old bike lodged among some trees.

Luck o' the Lesbians.

Much ado is made, in both the video and the Mail article, about the fact that, while the bike's frame is now rusty as a trombone, its vinyl banana seat (it seems like everyone says the phrase "banana seat" multiple times) has remained in pretty much mint condition.

It actually does look great. We should make people out of vinyl banana seats.

Banana seats banana seats banana seats.

Far and away the most hilarious moment of the video comes at the end, when The Lesbian speculates about what she and the wife should do now that they have found the bike (and its banana seat):

The little girl thought she had lost her new bike forever when she tumbled off a rickety bridge over a muddy stream in Wellfleet, Mass., 42 years ago.

But the bike has been found — by the now-grown woman's own wife.

Lisa Brown tells the Cape Cod Times (http://bit.ly/KX6O8h ) she was 11 when she lost control while riding over the Herring River in 1970 and fell in. She came up "smelling like a snapping turtle" but could not locate her bike in the muddy depths.

[Photo Gallery: Check Out These Animals Threatened by Global Warming.

Brown's wife, Deirdre Olinger, was walking along the stream this spring when she spotted a rusted bike tangled in the undergrowth about a quarter mile from the bridge.

Brown, tipped off by the banana seat, knew immediately it was hers. She describes the discovery like "finding a long lost friend."